i rely on myself, just making sure that was clear

i rely on myself, just making sure that was clear Jan 30, 2014 6:37:42 GMT

Post by Deleted on Jan 30, 2014 6:37:42 GMT

You know, everything had started out perfectly. A storybook romance couldn't have gone better. Best friends who finally fell in love, and after some trials and tribulations, they were finally together. They were in the clear. Everything was going to end up just fine — they'd graduate high school, maybe get married, adopt a kid or something. Everything was like a Nicholas Sparks movie.

For a little while, anyways, it seemed like everything was going to be okay. Orion might've even said that he was in love with Arlo. They were young, yes, but Orion knew how he felt, even if the feeling was completely foreign. Arlo made him happy, Arlo made him feel safe, and Arlo was always on his thoughts. Everything was Arlo, and everything was alright.

But they were teenagers. For sure, they were near twenty, but they were still kids. So young and still so early in their journey of life. Nothing created so haphazardly was meant to last. It was like a rusted over jalopy in a lot of sparkling sports cars, and the rust formed quickly on the relationship just like it did on the body of the old car.

Even so, it was unexpected. Unexpected like getting the wind knocked out of your lungs, unexpected like a hailstorm in the middle of August. Arlo's expression had gotten colder but that was normal, wasn't it? He never looked that happy. But Orion never expected to hear those words from Arlo, his boyfriend, his best friend. As it seemed, they were neither of these things anymore.

"This isn't working out," was all he'd really said. "Sorry, but it just isn't."

Orion didn't know what to say or do, so he stood there emotionless as possible until they parted ways and he'd returned home. Usually the two boys would spend time together after school but based on what Arlo'd said, that just...wouldn't be happening as often.

They didn't see each other much after that. Maybe passing in the hallways or that one class they'd had together, but that didn't matter since they sat very separated now. The year went and passed and the days flew by and soon graduation was upon them. There were no greetings, no smiles, nothing whatsoever. The ceremony went by without a hitch, of course, but it was nothing Orion cared to remember. He tried to ignore the fact that there was a boy he loved sitting a few rows back. A boy he still loved.

When they left that room, Orion didn't know it would be the last time he'd see Arlo for a long time. Years went by. He got a job, he found another relationship, he got the family he'd always wanted. Seeing that familiar face across a crowd was like a dagger in his heart and twisting the blade, bringing up the old scabs and scar tissue from so long ago.

It was like a dream, a bleeding dream where the background was fuzzy and his stomach was in knots. And just as soon as it had come on it left, with Arlo turning and leaving and getting lost in the crowd as Orion stared ahead, still lost in his ever-tumultuous mind.

He didn't know what Arlo was doing or how his life was going but one thing seemed to be a constant. He didn't need Orion now, just like he hadn't needed him back then. The dagger in his heart twisted harder, and Orion be damned if he wasn't bleeding out onto the floor, staining his white shoes.

Not that it mattered anyway.

It just didn't work out.

i rely on myself, just making sure that was clear Feb 10, 2014 22:13:10 GMT

Post by Deleted on Feb 10, 2014 22:13:10 GMT

He was 19 and life was great. Things couldn’t be going more smoothly, really – he had a job he always dreamed of having and he was doing well at it. He didn’t have a care in the world. Essentially he could do whatever he wanted. For Kieran Donagh, nothing could stop him and he was sitting comfortably in the middle of it all.

And now he was sitting comfortably in the driver’s seat in his car, with a girl he could only describe as an “Indian goddess” in the passenger seat. The car was sleek and fancy and brand new, his pride and joy, and it purred like a kitten as they raced down the country road with the top down and their hair flying in the wind.

He met her at a random college party he’d crashed with a few buddies. She wasn’t from around here as he’d never seen her before in his life, but he was certainly glad he’d seen her now. After talking to her for just a few minutes he knew she was a dynamite, a bombshell, and he just wanted to get to know her better.

He’d never really had girlfriends before. Maybe there was a few of those in high school, girls he hung around from time to time but he’d never actually seen it was a dating situation. Maybe that’s why most of those “relationship” ended so badly. But she seemed as unattached as he was and that was music to his ears.

They ended up on an overlook off the highway, the summer air hot around them even so late in the night. It was dark, the stars were starting to twinkle, and the city glittered in the distance. They could even see Nashville from this far up, even though it was a good and long drive away by this point.

He combed his fingers through his hair and pulled his tank top away from his body, separating the damp fabric from his skin. The girl – her name was Shani, she had said – was taming her hair as well, the thick dark curls tousled from the wind. He took the lapse in conversation to quite literally check her out, eyes washing over her form.

She looked…well, she was more than attractive. She looked strong; her arms were toned and he couldn’t help but be a little jealous. The girl was fit, practically the definition of it, and Kieran looked up at the stars above them and he couldn’t help but let out a little chuckle. Their luck was on his side tonight.

“It looks so pretty from up here.”

Her voice rang out in the quietness of night and he came back down from his thoughts, head turning to look at her. She was looking away, out at the mess of lights that was Nashville, and he peered over at it too.

“Yeah, it looks nice from up here, doesn’t it?” he responded, his deep drawl a harsh contrast to her feminine voice.

She smiled over at him a little, and her eyes were twinkling like the stars above them in the lights like some goddamn romance movie. He didn’t think this kind of stuff happened in real life but unless he was hallucinating, it was, and he’d never admit that this entire experience was getting more and more romantic by the moment.

He was a hopeless romantic in denial. But neither of them were looking for romance tonight. Kieran didn’t even know what Shani herself was looking for. But the moment was right, the air was warm and he couldn’t tell if it was lust or love blossoming in his chest but something in his foggy brain told him to just act on it.

In a moment his lips were smashed against hers, the kiss a bit rushed and definitely out of nowhere, but she wasn’t pushing him away. He felt her hands on his shoulders, sliding up so she could wrap her arms around his neck as they embraced.

When they broke for air he ducked for her neck, planting soft kisses along her jawline. He was feeling bold and ambitious and she seemed to be enjoying it, so he just continued. Continuing meant moving with her to the back seat of the car and meant bare skin against leather seats.

And all while the top was still down. How scandalous.

It all kind of tumbled together and before he knew it he was laying on his back, looking up at the starry sky as Shani shimmied her shorts back on. Dazed and only a little confused, he followed suit and redressed himself before climbing back into the driver’s seat.

They parted ways after that, after he brought her back into town. With one salty, bittersweet kiss she disappeared into the night that was phasing into the dark, early hours of morning. He’d probably never see her again, true, but Kieran was alright with that. He at least had his memories. Maybe he didn’t want to see her again – a one-night stand was meant to just stay for one night.

It wasn’t until seven years later that Kieran realized how wrong he’d been.